Next year

Just a few days ago I was stringing garland and white lights across my mantle and hanging gold jewel-adorned ornaments on my tree. I blinked and suddenly found myself at the mall, a mere seven days before Christmas, being herded through stores and down aisles, waiting in lines so long I made friends with the people around me. The most wonderful time of the year zips by in a flash, and at every holiday conclusion I vow to be more prepared, more organized and more frugal next year.

Well, it's "last year's next year" and here I am immersed in that rushed hustle and bustle...keeping track of all things purchased, attempting to please all but spoil none. Grab good deals, spend as little as possible without neglecting a friend, teacher or another appreciated soul who deserves a Christmas surprise. Cards and goodies, parties and Santa. Advent calenders (I have four this year--and yet, we have already hit the 24th on two--my kids have issues with patience...), outside lights with disconnected strands which are unable to coordinate and shine at once. Decadent chocolates and rich gooey desserts that tempt and tease during a month where "sensible eating" is a phrase uttered only in jest.

This is Christmas. It is a time for nonsensical, sleep-deprived, sugar loaded over extension! But tucked within the marathon shopping expeditions, endless child wish lists, counting dollars, balancing the loot, planning parties, and stress headaches, are those little twinges of "good cheer" that only the merriest of holidays can offer.

"She is going to LOVE this!"

"He is going to be SO surprised!"


Christmas carols, smells of cinnamon, anxious anticipation and unparalleled excitement from child, teen and adult alike. Kaleidoscopes of light, a tree I am IN LOVE with, Christmas cards boasting beautiful smiles of long time friends and beloved relatives. Wide eyes questioning each newly wrapped gift that finds its way under the tree, time with loved ones, dressy parties and Christmas stories. Gifts of service, my kindness tree, and of course, countless reminders of the Savior and a celebration of His birth, His life, and His ultimate sacrifice for us.

Christmas is all of this. The crazy and the sublime mixed together in a holiday hodge podge that never changes. As much as I'd like to think next year will be different, it won't. And that's ok, because I'll love it all the same!

home and food and clothing

When I was a little girl and would kneel down at night to say my prayers I would repeat an array of familiar phrases that summed up in my young mind the things I was happy to have. One of these expressions of thankfulness went like this:

"I am thankful for home and food and clothing."

I'm not sure how I came up with this, but I thought it sounded nice so I restated it each and every night.

Those childhood words came to my mind recently as I was taking advantage of this bounteous time of year to remember and reflect on the many blessings I enjoy.

I am still thankful for home but on a much different level. I have a dear friend who is fighting valiantly through the difficult reality of losing the home she and her family have lived in for many years. A faltering economy and unstable real estate market put so many in jeopardy these days. I am thankful for the comfort of home.

I am thankful for food and try not to take it for granted, but find myself making my way through Costco each week purchasing un-necessities like pirate's booty and chocolate covered pomegranate seeds...without a second thought... while I hear tales of people I know relying solely on food storage for nourishment as week after week passes with little to no income.

And I give thanks for clothing, especially warm coats, scarves and mittens, all missing on a little boy I spotted walking to school recently on a morning threatening snow and boasting temperatures below thirty.

I am thankful, truly, sincerely, for all that I have. Not only home...and food...and clothing...but for those who share these marvelous blessings with me.

These guys. They drive me crazy, and make me yell. They bring me to tears then keep me laughing for days. They are mine and I love them dearly.



This guy. He works his (cute) booty off to provide the comforts we enjoy on a daily basis. He is helpful and humble, sweet and understanding. He is my man and I adore him.



Waxing nostalgic, I have to mention a few others...










Happy Thanksgiving...May our homes be blessed, our food be plentiful and our clothing bring warmth and comfort!

"I'll trade you a Starburst for a Twix..."

"no way!"

"I'll throw in Milk Duds and some Skittles."

"DEAL!"

...and thus a round of well-contemplated swapping ended a week of frightfully fun (Halloween) festivities!

We savored spooktacular sights at our family party where freckled babies and dead golfers mingled with football players, rock stars...



bananas and...oompa loompas?



The karate kid and a hip hop skeleton showed up with a bit of riff raff this year...



Grandpa and Grandma oozed terror as an...um...pretty...ugly woman, and a rather possessed looking baby?



We feasted on our traditional homemade chili, dunked Fazoli's breadsticks and gobbled glazed doughnuts for dessert. We played games devised by Chris to entice teenagers and toddlers alike (how does she do that every year?) and tried our very best to carry on conversations with Cami while somewhat distracted by her bright orange face and grassy green hair.

Even Danny participated as a perfectly prim, posed little pumpkin!
(costume courtesy of Kelsey...made from scratch, actually scraps, of material she had lying around. Impressive, huh?)



Ward party, friend parties, school parties...at last the big day arrived.

Dinner before candy...but, dinner was a bit unconventional this year...



Intestines topped with bloody eyeballs, a bowlful of brains and witch fingers on the side. All washed down with a glass of ice cold blood and the trick-or-treaters were (just a tiny bit horrified) and set to go.










Candy bars arranged by brand and separated from tootsie rolls and blow pops. Glow sticks and rubber snakes (hands down favorite of all the loot) sat alone as the only items meant to last for more than a week. The bartering slowly hastens, half-eaten fruit snacks and snickers tossed aside. Stomachs began to churn. Suddenly sugar-coated treasures beg to be hidden.

That's my cue. Kids to bed. Bags to raid. Reese's and Hershey bars are mine, all mine...booohahahahahaha!!!

Falling

...leaves infused with crimson and copper; blanket the frosty ground with breathtaking hues of autumn.

...temperatures as crisp sunny days fold into cozy, blanket wrapping nights.

...in love with my husband over and over again watching him work so diligently to provide for our family and support our kids all while effortlessly transitioning his wardrobe from cargo shorts and tight muscle hugging t-shirts to 501s and snuggly sweatshirts.

...asleep well after midnight every night as I take in every fabulous minute of all my shows which are still rocking new episodes. (how did we survive without DVRs?)

...bank account balance due to rad new styles for fall this year...FLAT BOOTS and LONG BELTED SHIRTS. (kinda reminds me of styles from an iconic decade about twenty some odd years ago...)

...grades. That would be Lexi as she has decided that these crucial high school years will best be spent focusing on her social accomplishments rather than her academic ones.

...expectations that Luke will ever sleep all night in his own room. I have given up on that ridiculous notion as I prepare a berth of thick patterned blankets right next to my bed every night.

...numbers on the scales each morning as I continue to drop weight despite my compulsion to down sugar cookies without even a smidgen of restraint.

...okay, that last one was a complete fabrication (the weight loss, not the sugar cookies) but if I say it enough who knows...

Gazing through my windows each morning I am perplexed at mother nature's unique ability to watercolor her mountains into a scene of unparallelled beauty and wonder.

Underneath the vibrant colors lies the cold beginnings of winter, but those are masked by the majestic miracle of fall.

I think I have a tiny bit of that same ability. Although I have days where I feel my life is falling apart at the seams as I strive to keep up with kids, housework, relationships, church callings, work, and all of the emotions, complications and complexities that accompany a mom's endeavors, I am able to color my world beautiful, focus on the many vivid blessings that make me who I am and add purpose and value to my life.

Just imagine the value if I really were able to lose weight...cookies in tow. Oh well, Christmas is quickly approaching maybe things will go my way then...

War and Peace (ful days)

I feel as though I entered a combat zone last week.

I am just now feeling safe enough to emerge from my (symbolic) camouflaged place of hiding where I kept both home phone and/or cell phone within finger length distance, and one eye constantly on the clock counting down each hour that passed without a pleading call.

Mornings remain difficult as shots continue to fire in the form of "Can't I stay home, just this once?" Or the ever deadly "I have NO IDEA what to wear," usually accompanied by "these shoes DO NOT fit!"

They say once you've seen war nothing will ever look the same to you again...

I say once you've sent your youngest (extremely anxious) child off to school for a full day, your second youngest (not quite as anxious, but very self conscious and unsure)child to a new school for fifth grade, and your oldest (extremely anxious, self conscious and unsure) child to high school...you had better be grateful you are not looking at life through the tiny, barred window of a psychiatric hospital...



The COMBATANTS...



Luke. Don't let the adorable grin and dapper duds fool you. Tears the size of gumdrops have managed to rip my heart into a million pieces each and every morning since the beginning of last week. After school has been a different story, however, as tales of new friends and a super nice teacher have begun to heal some of the battle wounds (aka stress, anxiety, tummy aches, etc.) --for us both!



Jaycee. Looking lovely as ever in a uniform that has lessened the differences in size and allowed new friends to focus on her ever engaging personality, not to mention her killer earrings and shoes by Fergie!



Roo. She's a teenager. Need I say more? Hair must be perfect , clothes stylish yet original...otherwise...I become target practice for looks that could seriously kill!



Lexi. Oh my. As a Sophomore she has joined me in battle as well as turned on me without any warning at all. Emotions and fears have marked the beginning of a whole new chapter in her life...and mine. Will she make friends...? "I don't know anybody, and nobody knows me!" Will she get involved...? "No way am I running for office/joining a club/introducing myself to people I don't know!" Will I ever see her...? "Tennis practice, football game, party at Emily's, sleepover at Whitney's!" The pressures have been relentless, but we are gaining strength and...actually...having fun!

As for me, I have resolved to lick my wounds by way of spontaneous pedicures and lunches with friends and enjoy the peace born of battles that delivered me to this phase of life wherein freedom and time to myself are welcomed, and well deserved...if I do say so myself!

Idolness equals happiness

Every year there is one day. One glorious, happy day in which my obsession and love for the phenomenon that is American Idol is accepted, celebrated, matched and even dwarfed by the mania of others.

American Idol Live Tour.

This year it fell on a beautiful, balmy Tuesday. I packed a cooler full of drinks and bags with snacks and my girls and I set off for the E-Center to wait for the arrival of the idols. After about two hours they drove in on buses. We could see them through tiny windows waving at the fifty or so women and children gathered and screaming their names. Any sign of Adam? Not yet, but I am hoping and praying for a glimpse of my gothic glam rock icon.

Waiting so patiently for someone, anyone to emerge...



Finally, after another hour or so of killing time and making friends with the ladies beside us adorning Adam inspired t-shirts and blue streaks in their hair (seriously, there are many who are FAR more fanatical than I), out strolled Michael Sarver and Matt Giraud!




Both were extemely gracious, charming and cute, cute, cute! They posed for numerous photos, even threw in some hugs and high fives.

Danny Gokey was next and his sighting was signaled by ear piercing shieks and declarations of love and affection.




He is one hot preacher man in person! Super kind, very genuine as well.

The crowd was treated to one more pre-show idol...Scott Macintyre who was every bit as sweet and witty as he was on the idol stage!



Alas, no Adam. I'll just have to wait til tonight...

...and what a night it was!!!



I reminded over and over and over again why I love American Idol more than anything else on the planet!

The talent, the stage presence, the music, the variety, the energy...







and Adam... beautiful, fantastically creative, mesmerizing Adam!

He rocked the stage, stole the show and killed every song, from Led Zeplin to David Bowie.





Dressed head to toe in black leather, silver chains dangling from his neck, hair spiked in a perfectly rockesque fashion he danced and screamed, as we danced and screamed even louder. He was sexy and raw, uninhibited and captivating!

Yes. I know he's gay.

I'm married.

So what.

I'd still take him home.

Who wouldn't?

After the un-be-liev-able show we hastily made our way to the back of the venue and scooted and shoved our way to the front of the crowd (one must not be courteous in any way when it comes to getting up close and personal with the idols...).




The entire group made an appearance one by one, signing autographs, and posing for pictures. Adam was surrounded by security, so I was not able to grab a hold of him like I had planned...but I will forever cherish the memory of our short, but touching conversation...

me: (shrill, shrieking, crazed, manic sounding) "I LOVE YOU ADAM!!!"

Adam: (subdued, soft response with just the tiniest hint of a lysp) "thanks, I love you too..." (accompanied by a sweet little multi-fingered wave).





Truly...the happiest place on earth, and the most wonderful day of the year!