Oh summertime, I am lovin' you...

...and your long, lazy days filled with a whole lot of nothin' 'cept foolin' and playin' and loungin'...

At Scofield just sittin' round the fire, cookin' smores and sharin' tales.








Lightin' fireworks to celebrate the independence of our great nation.




Paradin' as the Bunnell Beach Bums, snaggin' best family entry.




Swimmin', golfin', and goofin' for a week in (sweltering) St. George.











Culturin' with live theater at Tuacahn. Foot tappin' to Footloose!



(that is Thayne from so you think you can dance...last season...LOVE HIM!)

Oh summertime, I am lovin' you and your days filled with grillin' and
messin' with family, playin' with friends, cartin' sunglasses and sunscreen, sleepin' outside and campin' in the family room.

Let's just keep on goin'...neverendin' summer...sounds just about perfect to me...

Then, now

THEN




July, 1990. Jackson Hole, Wyoming. Newlyweds, madly in love. Juggling school, work...that's about it. Forking out a whopping $210 per month rent for our quaint, spotlessly clean, two-bedroom townhouse. Perched on the cusp of adulthood, ready to jump in and conquer an enticing world of career, parenthood and responsibility...

(all while sporting a lovely triangular hairdo and rocking a pale denim, pegged-pant and coordinating jacket ensemble with double shoulder pads. My handsome groom smashing a pair of (kinda high-waisted) Girbaud jeans...and...hair!)

NOW



June, 2009. Jackson Hole, Wyoming. Wed for nearly nineteen years, madly in love. Juggling work, kids, carpools, activities, kids, finances, home projects, and kids...that's about it. Forking out a whopping $210 times, um, a lot, for our (not so spotless due to four kids and a burned out mom) home, in addition to lots of funds doled out to keep to keep the little ones clothed, entertained and "well-rounded." Perched on the cusp of insanity due to that little plunge we took a couple of decades ago...

If we could, would we revisit those carefree, simple days?

Visit perhaps, but not stay. (did I mention double shoulder pads?)

Though our lives are no longer just our own, but shared (and not always evenly) with those whom we have bred, and demands for time, attention and money are enough to send us into a mind numbing craze from time to time...

We will stay put. Learn from our mistakes (including unflattering hairstyles) and celebrate our successes (mostly happy, semi-normal kids) (oh, and mid to low rise jeans).

My boy...

my one and only boy, loves legos, baseball, motorcycles, animals, showing his muscles, and shocking his sisters with a variety of colorful potty words.

Kindergarten is all wrapped up complete with teacher attachment (me, even more than him), darling new friends, out-grown uniforms, and above grade level success in practically every subject. As we reach this milestone, this culmination and completion of those precious "younger years," I reflect on my boy, and his strengths and struggles, his abilities and insecurities, as well as on me, and my strengths and struggles, my abilities and insecurities when it comes to this little man that I love so very much.

I wonder...how do I cope with the idea of putting him in the care of another person in just a few short months, one that neither of us knows, for almost seven hours each day? I know I relinquished my girls to the same fate, and they, as well as I survived without much impairment at all.

But this is my boy. My one and only boy...

My boy is a smarty-pants as well as kind, sensitive, and funny.

(My boy has such anxiety he panics when he doesn't know exactly where I am (even within the house).)

My boy terrorizes his sisters until they scream and threaten to kill him. His response? Turn up the heat and laugh hysterically while running at full speed as far away from them as possible.

(My boy has such anxiety he calls me every fifteen minutes when I'm out on a quick dinner date with his daddy.)

My boy loves to buy new toys. Money will literally burn a hole in his pocket if not spent on something that can accompany sound effects made by puffing out his cheeks and making a "blowing up" (as in dynamite as opposed to a balloon) sound as soon as said money is acquired.

(My boy has such anxiety he begins anticipating the dreaded nighttime ritual by noon, at least. ("why do we have to have night?"))

My boy worships his dad and tries to imitate and emulate his mannerisms, hobbies and looks. (he's growing out his hair to make up for a future of baldness!)

(My boy has such anxiety he often refuses to play at a friend's house for fear that I may leave and not be at home if and when he returns.)

My boy is a gentleman. He will open the door for me, watch out for me, comfort me when I am sad, hug me at exactly the right times, and stick up for me when his sisters' are getting feisty.

My boy is wonderful but fearful, sweet but concerned.

How do I pave a way for him to grow and mature into a confident and hopeful young man while protecting him from the things that frighten and trouble him every day?

My boy..my one and only boy loves superheroes and star wars, his momma, spongebob and american idol (he is my son after all). He is afraid of the dark, spiders, bees, and being left alone.

I love his long locks, the amber freckles sprinkled across his nose and cheeks, his laughing eyes, outrageous vocabulary, and propensity for winning at most games we play. I am afraid that he will be afraid while he's away from me.

But I can't hold onto him forever.

(Dang!)

My boy is growing up. He will be ok...won't he?

Remember those perms?

It's me...circa 1987...

It's all about the hair (the bigger the better).

Just kidding.

Today is crazy hair day.

Crazy thing is, I don't see anything crazy about Jaycee's hair.

I just see fabulous style that never should have gone OUT of style!

I have never been so proud...

Sure, it's only May, but my summertime is just around the corner

Yesterday I wore shorts, t-shirt and flip flops. Sure, I was a little chilly strolling the aisles of Smiths, but I projected the appearance of a hot, summery day.

The thermostat barely cleared seventy, but my whole demeanor screamed eighty-five!!!

Two weeks ago we spent a Saturday at Lagoon. Sure, jackets were necessary, and Flying Aces induced chills, but other than the temperature... it felt like summer. The sights and smells, the butterflies that tickle our tummies while anticipating Wicked's launch straight up into the sky were there...as if...it were July.

Monday we went to Chris's pool. Heated to a balmy 92 degrees, the kids remained submerged in the clear blue water unwilling to step out into less than scorching temperatures, and I remained firmly planted on my lounge chair, soaking in rays of sunshine and holding onto each moment that the air stood still and the warmth of the overhead sun offered a mini moment where I could imagine that relaxed, lazy feeling only summer can truly offer. Sure, I had goosebumps covering every inch of sunscreen lathered skin, but I also have a very discernible tan line to show for my efforts.

Every day this week I have kept my windows open to air out the mustiness that lurked and settled during the long winter months. Sure, the cool air wafting through my screens is just frigid enough to kick on the furnace, but I can hear the birds singing, smell the newborn blooms from my neighbor's immaculate yard, and feel the breeze as it kicks up dust and fills my home with scents of a sunny season.

Late nights have replaced sensible bedtimes as my kids run from house to house beckoning neighbors and friends to join them in celebrating the long hours of daylight. Riding bikes, jumping on tramps, or just sitting outside on the (finally green) lawn they long for the same freedom that I do. Sure, they are exhausted when I drag them out of bed for school each morning, but we are all so bored and tired of the restrictions and restraints placed by strict and arduous school month schedules.

We yearn for non-structure, days spent at the pool, suntans, bare feet, boating, sleepovers, campouts, slushies, and sweltering heat. Sure, summer will be here in all its glory before we know it, but I'd just as soon welcome it with open arms...tomorrow!

...and every splendid element that accompanies this fabulous city!

Just shy of a year ago, after coming to terms with the sad truth I would not be able to accompany my high school friends on a girls' trip to the Mexican Riviera as a celebration of our fortieth year, I resolved to plan an alternative means of commemorating this milestone birthday. New York was the obvious choice of destination and Jennie and Rachelle were must-have companions on this momentous adventure. We plotted and planned a vacation that seemed so far away in time...

When it finally arrived we were fully prepared to take the Big Apple by storm and leave no sight unseen, no experience...un...experienced!

How can I even begin to describe four days brimming with freedom, shopping, stalking, exploring, adventuring, eating, strolling, hailing, applauding, screaming, all while laughing over everything and nothing, creating memories and taking full advantage of an incredible once in a lifetime (hopefully not-we REALLY want to go back) event!




At the airport as we awaited our long plane ride home, much more subdued than we had been for several days, reflecting on our experiences, and anticipating reentry into real life, Rachelle questioned,

"K...What are your top three highlights?"

I answered first though Rachelle and Jennie both had identical lists.

1. "Constantine"





After four years of obsessed infatuation we finally were able to meet/accost the stunning long-haired rocker/American Idol Alum (season four for those not quite as obsessed). He was gracious and humble, accommodating and charming...even the second time we came around to see him! His Broadway hit Rock of Ages was delicious, rowdy fun that took us back to the famed rock and roll era of our youth!


2. "Wicked"




The music, the story, the emerald themed theater all created a Broadway experience unlike any other! I was so consumed with the mesmerizing production that when it ended I felt as though I was saying goodbye to a long forsaken friend!

3. "Shopping...SoHo and Canal Street."



While taking in the outrageous awesomeness that is Canal Street we were approached by a tiny Asian woman.

"you like designer purse?"

"yes we do!"

We followed our swift little guide down two blocks, around a corner and into a little store. The shop looked just like the many lining Canal Street, but then we were led through a door and down a long unfinished staircase into a musty basement below. I figured we would either come out of there with some rockin' purses...or we wouldn't come out at all...Luckily we were ushered into an obscure room filled to the brink with beautiful handbags and purses of every shape, size and color. Dolce and Gabana, Juicy Couture, Guess, Prada, Coach, Louis Vuiton...displayed in all their lovely knock-off glory! Needless to say, we walked out with humongous smiles on our faces and black plastic garbage bags containing two purses a piece in our hands!

Can I really limit it to three...? Of course not, here's the rest...

Walking the Brooklyn Bridge and strolling through Central Park. Gazing at the illustrious Statue of Liberty as we skimmed by on the Statten Island Ferry. Oh how I loved the infectious energy of Times Square, and the pizzeria in Little Italy where we each ate an entire pizza while guessing how many people were named Vinny and Tony in the vicinity. Riding the subway where I had hoped only to not be knifed, and to see rats--both were accomplished. Watching Rachelle hail a cab like she was a NY native, and posing every two feet so Jennie could take another picture. The people, the sights, the sounds...






All culminated into a trip that was so much more than a trip! It was a much needed escape from the worries and trials of life. A celebration of reaching forty...

...and a reminder that best friends are are a gift unparalled, to be appreciated, adored and admired!



(even more than a cheap G&B purse!)

Who dyes Easter Eggs at nine o'clock at night?

...someone who just can't seem to get her (c.r.a.p.) together...!!!

At eight thirty five Friday night before Easter I said to Jaycee and Luke,

"Go get your pj's on, I'm running to the grocery store, when I get back we'll dye our eggs."

They looked at me, then looked at each other.

"Yay! We get to color eggs AT NIGHT!!!"

I put a pot on water on the stove to boil and filled it to the brink with pure white fragile looking eggs.

"Keep an eye on the stove, guys!" I hollered on my way out the door.

Twenty two minutes later our kitchen smelled of vinegar, as eggs, hands and counter tops began to turn shades of green, blue, hot pink and orange.





Thus began our whirlwind weekend of celebration.

Why must everything be so rushed?

Saturday commenced with a memorable trip to the temple to witness the sealing of sweet Trey to his family. What a beautiful experience watching my sister and her family all dressed in white standing together in the plush glory of the temple sealing room. It was a rare glimpse in an eternal perspective...so appropriate this Easter weekend.

A quaint family gathering organized to perfection by my fabulous younger sis was a nice time to visit with relatives and celebrate Trey's official conduction into the Halling family and onto the records of the church.

Work followed.

Then a late night filling baskets with goodies and toys. No secrecy needed as we do not believe in the Easter Bunny in our family. Years ago one Easter Eve when Lexi and Kelsey were young I spent the better part of an hour (at least) attempting to calm two hysterical little girls who were suddenly terrified at the notion of a giant bunny hopping through our house during their slumber. I finally had to dispel the ridiculous fantasy in order to soothe their worries...

"THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS THE EASTER BUNNY!" I exclaimed. "Dad and I fill your baskets, hide the eggs, EVERYTHING!"

They just looked at me with eyes wide and tear-filled.

"Ok, that makes me feel better..."

and that was the end of the bunny!




Easter Sunday was lovely...up until Primary where I attempted to teach the story of the Resurrection to a group of nine six year olds visibly rushing from the gallons of sugar engulfed in the form of marshmallow peeps and jellybeans. A young visitor to our class added to the mayhem as he recounted experiences of helping his grandfather slaughter cattle (what?!). Before I realized what was being said, he explained in great detail the slicing, bleeding, and whining of a dying animal to the horror of myself and the rest of the kids and compounded the attention issue by regaling my young class with a nauseatingly nightmarish story. Attempts to bring focus back to the sacred subject at hand were hardly possible, so I relented and passed out plastic eggs containing...even more sugar.

After church we hosted an Easter dinner with Scott's side of the family and each of the kids gathered multi-colored eggs hidden within the nooks and crannies of our backyard. Bubble gum, tootsie rolls and even a few dollar bills (slipped in by Grandma) ended up in the baskets of the enthusiastic children.







As the day came to a close I had just a few moments to reflect on the holiday that had just taken us by storm. Despite late night egg coloring, out of control primary kids, and organizing Easter dinner, I was somehow able to hold consistently in the back of my mind an image of the Savior in his resurrected glory and feel his sacrifice and love for me...


...the one who just can't seem to get things together.